When I was 50 I decided to try and run. I had never run before and joined a Couch to 5k programme with the local running club.
Initially, it was great, with a really encouraging group. But I was one of the only ones who had not run before and I started to fall behind the others. They had a policy where they would stop and wait when someone fell behind – but then I felt guilty for holding everyone up. But I kept going. And then on one run, I was at the back of the group and two women had been asked to stay at the back to ensure no one was lost. They were close behind me the whole time – chatting and totally ignoring me. At one point they even passed me and then realised and came back and asked why I was so slow! I stopped going after that.
Then, last year, I was seeing a physio for some back pain and she told me about another running group. They were so friendly with a run/walk group that I joined that week. I started mostly walking, progressing to more and more running, until finally, with a lot of encouragement, I ran 5k 🙌. And although I was often at the back of the group, this time it was OK. This time I was encouraged and supported. The run leaders had empathy of how hard I found it (let’s face it I am not built for running!). And they had a theory that they then shared with me:
You have to take care of the slowest ones in the group as if you don’t then they will stop coming. Then someone else will be the slowest and if you don’t care for and encourage them they will stop coming. Then if you don’t care for the next person they will stop coming. (You get the picture!). And eventually, you have no group.
What a great philosophy and so different to the first group.
Unfortunately, I hurt my hip and had to stop for a few months, and the group have now started a Couch to 5k which we started last night. The same ethos and the same enthusiasm! I know I will run 5k again, this time hopefully a bit faster – and all with the support and encouragement of this amazing group!
I got to thinking about the difference between the two clubs – the expertise in running a group was the same, the qualifications as run leaders were the same. But the second group was encouraging, took care of everyone and went above and beyond in how they cared for me. And I stuck with them and even went back again when life got in the way.
Coaches in sport work in the same way, getting the best out of their teams when they are encouraging and have empathy. And business coaches are the same! If you have a business coach that is not your biggest encourager then maybe they are not the right one.
And if you are looking for someone to help you look to what the future holds, set goals and be accountable to – then ensure it is someone who will encourage you!
Are you an encourager? Who have you been encouraged by?
Jacqui Hanbury is the Managing Director of The Pathway Communication Company Limited and is a specialist in helping you find the thing that is stopping your business from achieving as much as it could be. Follow her on LinkedIn to find out more.
The Pathway Communication Company Ltd provides a personalised plan to help you and your business move forward. We might help you set goals, a strategy, a communication plan, facilitate a meeting, be a coach or mentor. Whatever it takes. Find out more at: www.pathwaycc.co.uk